My part time job where I don't receive a W-2

Picture it....

Orlando...

Saturday, January 16th, 2010...

Kristen's house...

Excitement...

Enthusiasm...

Why???

That was the time I proposed to Kristen.

Now, I could go on and on and on about how I proposed (all the women saying, "YEAAAA", all the guys saying, "NOOOO"), so I won't, but I did surprise her. And, that alone is an accomplishment. Trying to surprise Kristen is like trying to surprise the Secret Service. They have everything planned out for days and have run every scenario in their heads beforehand. So much so, that about a year earlier, we have this conversation...

Kristen: "Honey, just in case you ever want to propose this is the ring I want. (Hands me the Tiffany's catalog)."

Me: "What?"

Kristen: "Here is the sales lady's business card with her information. You see how I wrote down the ring size, the clarity and the cut."

Brian: "Not the cost?"

Kristen: "Make sure it's a Princess Cut. Remember PRINCESS CUT."

Brian: "A what?"

Kristen: "I've always wanted Tiffany's.ever since I was a little girl, my mom and I would go to Tiffany's in New York City and look at the rings...we did this for years...I love Tiffany's."

Brian: "Breathe, Honey."

Kristen: "We can have whatever kind of wedding you want, I just care about the ring. Hey, I'm doing you a favor. I'm already telling you what ring you want. You don't have to guess. We know how you are with guessing."

Brian: "Hey, the Christmas 2008 debacle was an anomaly. That was our first Christmas together ( she returned 80% of what I got her)."

Kristen: "This is helpful. Remember Princess Cut and no Yellow Gold. Oh and....no pressure."

At that moment, I knew if my apartment had a fire, I HAD to take the Tiffany's catalog out with me. I couldn't lose that thing. Learning from past gift giving adventures such as the Bag Clip of Valentine's 2009, I had to nail this.

Fortunately, I did.

But, that's not what I want to talk about.

I want to talk about the huge, glamorous, expensive, gaudy business of...

Wedding Planning

Proposal Day we spent a day and a half calling friends and family. Conversations went like this...

Kristen: "Look!!! (holding out her ring finger)

Women: "OOOOOHHHHHH!!!!! (with a high pitched squeal that would wake up any dog within a half mile radius) I'm so happy for you (jumping up and down). When are you getting married?"

OR...

Brian: "I got engaged."

Guys: "Congratulations. I'm happy for you. Want to get some Tijuana Flats?"

Brian: "Sure"

Shortly after that, Kristen wanted to go right into Wedding Planning mode. I wanted to spend a month during Engagement mode. So, which one do you think we lived out?

Wedding planning mode it is. I should get used to this decision making hierarchy, shouldn't I?

First thing we did...wedding venues. Kristen looked up fifty different places to get married and have the reception. We would have loved to have the ceremony at our church (Summit Church in Orlando), but it's an old movie theatre, so the layout isn't really conducive to a wedding that we want. So, if we could double down at a site, that'd be perfect.

And we did. First place we looked at...

Women's Club of Winter Park. We could have the ceremony outside (October 23rd, worried about rain in the fall, but what can you do? We'd move it inside. Don't worry Mom. You're done up hair won't get ruined (frizzed up otherwise in the Florida heat), and we could have the reception inside. Perfect. Except for the fact that when we went there to look at it, the air conditioning wasn't on and I didn't like the men's bathroom. And because of that, I was hesitant about the place. I was told I was crazy. We booked the Women's Club (remember that decision making hierarchy). One down, 500 more decisions to go.

Next up...wedding photographers...one of the most important aspects for Kristen. She wants our wedding to be well documented. I want her to have what she wants ("AWWWW"), but come closer and I'll let you in on a little secret...

Little closer...

Closer...

I don't care that much about the pictures. Just not really my thing and that's saying something since I shoot video for a living. But, this is different. This is a person that follows you around for five hours, taking 1500 pictures and you'll buy maybe fifty of them. And you'll never look at them.

Fortunately, this is how I used to feel about wedding pictures until I met Ashley McCormick of Mount Dora. Kristen found her on The Knot (Her electronic BFF the first month of our engagement), they met in person and she's loved her ever since. Everytime she gets on her website: ashleymccormickblog.net, Kristen becomes starry eyed and says, "I Just Love Her". If we turned those four words into a drinking game every night, I'd constantly call in sick the next morning due to Hangover-itis. It'd be an epidemic in my world.

A week and a half ago, we took our engagement pictures. They took three hours and she shot more than 600 pictures. Amazing. Kristen may leave me for her. I wouldn't put it past her. We'll post the pics when we get them.

Next up...let's get us a DJ. Kristen went back to her Internet BFF, The Knot. It was between Jay Edwards aka Jay Liquid (maybe he's constantly thirsty), and Al Dee. She spoke with them first and then, like a relief pitcher in baseball, I came in to close the deal.

Oh, COME ON!!! Let me think that's my role.

Got a great feeling form Jay. Talked to him on the phone for thirty minutes. He daylights as a radio DJ at a local Orlando station. The thing I learned the most from him...he loves what he does and he gets so involved, people think he masquerades as the wedding planner. A year ago, I never thought I'd know or care so much about wedding planning.

And then there was Al Dee. We wouldn't actually get Al Dee, we'd get one of his DJ's Indio. Latin, boisterous, and fun loving. Right up Kristen's alley. She had a great feeling when we left that meeting, but since I'm the closer (stop laughing, honey), I was more hesitant. I felt deep down he wasn't the right fit for us. I didn't think our personalities matched. But, Kristen was so into Indio, and DJ was the most important aspect of the wedding for her, I didn't want to disappoint her. So, I prayed for the right moment to tell her that I really didn't want to go with him, and if that moment didn't happen, then apparently, he would be the right fit for us.

Five days later, my prayer was answered (thank God) when she randomly said to me, she wasn't sure about going with Al Dee and she wanted to change her mind. I always liked Jay the best, because he's a safe, quality choice for us. He'll make sure people are always dancing, and that's why Kristen loves him. She wants, no, I should say, Kristen needs people to be dancing the entire time. It's a dream wedding for her if the dancing is great. She loves to dance and she said she's not going around to the other tables to say, "Hello", if they want to talk to her, come out onto the hardwood and catch her in between songs (are you really going to drag my sweet 89 year old Granny out onto the floor just to get in a quick, high pitched, "HIIII KRISSSSS"), but be quick, because she plans on dancing the entire night ("KRISSSSSS...HOLD UPPP"), until the next morning when she complains, like her birthday dancing night, that she's not 21 anymore, because her knees hurt, thus completing another epic run on sentence that cannot be challenged by even the most ardent writers. Oh, and did I mention she works on the wedding playlist almost everyday, and yet the wedding is still six months away?

Solid.

So, the kicker for her was she was driving past Al Dee's office and she swears that Al Dee cut her off while trying to pull into traffic. And that's how you lose business. Whatever it takes. I'll take Jay and not look back.

Last but not least, the caterers.

Oh, the caterers.

Oh...oh...OH...the caterers.

That will be an entirely separate blog.