Hello Man vs Food...I'd like to throw my hat into the ring

Family Health...

401 K...

Work...

All of these things are very important to almost everyone. You know what's not?

The amount of food I can stuff into my stomach in a short amount of time.

As many of you have seen Man vs Food host, Adam Richman, travel around the country and take restaurants' epic challenges...eating a seven and a half pound burrito...a hamburger consisting of twelve patties...downing fifteen milkshakes in an hour...you get the idea. I used to envy this guy. Everyone raise their hands on who would want to try these challenges.

(Looking around)

Why am I the only one with my hand up. And why am I yelling, "Pick me...PICK ME!!!"

However, after last night, I had an epiphany. The thing Travel Channel doesn't tell you is that Adam is getting bigger and bigger.. His waist is slowly becoming a new Travel Channel 3-D show, where you see his waist line expand into your living room. Next season they're coming out with a new show...Man vs Heart Transplant.

But, for one brief moment in time, I had a glisten in my eye that Adam understands. The moment was...

Daytona Beach Cubs Belly Buster Night.

It had everything that I love...

Kristen (I wanted her there in case I needed an immediate ride to the hospital)

Baseball

Food

More food

Food on top of Food

Let me give you a little background. This week has been tough for me. I've been working morning show which means I'm waking up at 2am and if you think, I'm going to bed before 10pm, that's cute, I should introduce myself to you again (upon reading this, the universe will immediately guarantee a 1500 mile phone call from my mother in New York that will go something like this, "Brian, you really need to get some sleep." "OK Mom." "Brian, you need sleep, it's very important. You don't get enough sleep. I wish you would sleep more. Are you listening? Sleep...SLEEP!!" "OK, Mom" "That's it I'm calling Kristen.")

With that said, I decided to go hard, instead of going home. I knew that I would have an eventual stomach ache after minimal sleep the next day, but how often will I have a chance to eat the following...all unlimited and all free...

Popcorn

Peanuts

Hamburgers

Hot Dogs

Pizza

Fish Dip

Artichoke Dip

Beer (because Kristen's friend has a "hook up")

Oh, and unlimited steak off the grill (same "hook up", who will be getting a nice shiny Christmas card this year).

May 17th, 2010 will forever be remembered as the day I entered the gates of culinary heaven.

In a span of ten minutes, I whipped around like an eight year old kid at Toys R Us (back in the 1990s of course. No kid wants to go there now. They all want iPhones.)

Artichoke Dip, check.

Fish Dip....good...check.

Hamburgers, I could have gotten five hamburgers in one bun, again it's unlimited...but settled for one...check (pacing myself).

Feeling stronger after that, move to hot dog...good...check.

Peanuts, hmmm...takes more time to snap open and eat, not a lot of food content, but I should mix something smaller in, gives me a little time for digestion...check.

So, after ten minutes, I'm two beers and a pound of food in. At this point, I'm wishing my buddy Timmy was here, who can pack more food in than a bear at the zoo. Watching him eat barbecue....or cheese less pizza (don't ask)...or multiple garbage plates (http://img301.imageshack.us/i/rochester-n-y_is-the-garbage_plate.jpg/) this should all be on everyone's bucket list. We'll call it Timmy Grazing. Next time I'm in upstate New York, I'm setting a web camera at his dinner table and he's going to call me right before big culinary events and I'll put it online. You'll find yourself wearing Timmy t-shirts, chanting his name from home.

Unfortunately, no one chants your name here. Except for the motivational speech I was giving myself, "You can do this Brian. This food doesn't OWN you. You OWN them. Now go and get what's yours." In hindsight, does "yours" signify a medal, a celebration or a night hovering around the toilet. Hmmm...

I go back for a second hamburger. Still good.

No pizza yet. They're coming back with more. I'll wait.

Go up and watch a couple innings of the game. Yeah, a game was actually going on. I thought I was in the middle of a free cafeteria, but I was wrong. Sat about eight rows away from home plate. Of course, it's general admission and not a bad view from a 4000 seat house that sits a mile away from the ocean, so what's not to like.

After a couple innings, I go back. Maybe it was all the food that was taunting me as people were walking to their seats. "Brian...Brian....BRIAN!!!" I could hear them. I OWN you!

Pizza's back. Give me some of that. Two slices. I saw someone walk away with five. That's my style. However, I wanted a third hamburger to carry back and didn't want to drop any food (it's like I was a football coach drawing up X's and O's, there's a survival mentality to this). Oh, and let's grab a box of popcorn.

Back to the seats where my third beer awaits, along with my pizza, burger and popcorn.

Now I'm good. About two pounds in, three beers later, six hours until I have to go back to work. All is good with the world. Until...

Kristen's friend's boyfriend or her "KFBF" runs stadium operations which means we can do whatever we want for the most part. This includes throwing down a full steak an hour later, with potatoes. A full dinner, after a gorge fest, five hours before I'm supposed to arrive at work. I threw down that steak like a prize fighter slugging it out in the 11th round. I'm just trying to get to the decision and leave it up to the judges.

Every piece going in is a fight, that I'm always excited about on paper. In real life, my excitement wanes like when that eight year old kid's iPhone breaks.

I finish it. And there's more if I want it. I've always wanted to eat unlimited steak. Seriously. Ever since I was 11. This was my time. However, with an hour's drive back to Orlando, and my spastic colon on "Thunderstorm Warning", it was best for me to bow to the crowd and move on.

So, let's recap...

Box of Popcorn

Peanuts

Little Italian Ice

Steak

Potatoes

Three Hamburgers

Hot Dog

Slice of Pizza

Fish Dip

Artichoke Dip

Four Beers

Safe to say when I woke up, after two hours of sleep, I was foodover. I didn't eat until ten hours into my day.

Here's the point...whenever you have unlimited food and beer, tread carefully. There has to be a method to the madness. If you go in guns blazing, you'll wind up doubled over, hugging a garbage can. No one wants that noise. Especially the garbage can.

However, Timmy if you want a challenge, it's July 5th, back in Daytona for another belly buster. We're eyeing a rematch. Hide the women, kids and garbage cans.